| Cross Country Ramble 42:
Awards Date: 4/14/98 11:11:12 PM Eastern Daylight Time
Biking across the US has convinced us we live in a wonderful
country. However, it also has a few quirks. In honor of both the
wonderful and not so wonderful we present these Ramble Awards.
Ken's award for Most Emotional Day goes to March
30, 1996, in Ventura, CA, when we left family and friends to start
this long-dreamed-of journey (see
Cross-Country Ramble 3: Leaving All).
Most Perceptive Filmmaker award goes to Spike
Lee, for including us in Get On the Bus (see
Cross-Country Ramble 5: First Pass, First Desert for two stills
from the film).
Ken's Biggest High/Biggest Low award goes to
April 13, 1996, the day we rode from Brawley, CA, to Palo Verde, CA.
After successfully accomplishing our first 70-mile day, we arrived
at our destination just as the sun was going down, only to find no
room in the inn. As we sat in shock considering our options, we were
taken in for the night by bicyclers who lived across the street (see
Cross-Country Ramble 10: People Never Cease
to Amaze).
The award for Best State for Non-smokers goes to
California, which allows no smoking in any public buildings and has
few smokers.
 Ken's
award for Best Roadside Tree Species goes to the
Palo Verde we enjoyed throughout most of Arizona. These strange
no-leaf trees were abloom with small bright yellow flowers all up
and down their green-barked branches. Seeing them never failed to
perk me up.
The Good Intentions Gone Awry award goes to
Phoenix, for creating wonderfully landscaped bike paths and then
lining them with thorn-producing tire-puncturing desert plants and
trees (see Cross-Country Ramble 12: Attitude).
The Worst Uphill award goes to the first half of
the ride from Superior, AZ, to Globe, AZ. It was
ride/walk/ride/walk. No (meaning not any) shoulder. Trucks both
ways. Once, grinding up a long steep uphill bridge, Ken, exhausted,
leaned over onto the bridge railing and just held on for a while,
staring into the abyss and feeling the bridge shake as trucks
pounded past. (see Cross-Country Ramble 13:
Real Mountains )
The Best Downhill award goes to the second half
of the ride from Superior to Globe. We hit speeds of 40 mph on a
curvy road. It required an act of will to keep our hands off the
brakes. Thrilling!
The "Duh" award goes to Ken & Carol, for taking
off one day before sunrise to beat the desert heat, counting on our
taillights to keep us safe, then discovering that without headlights
we couldn't see the road in front of us.
The Worst Motel award goes to the gas
station/convenience store/motel in tiny Duncan, NM. This run-down
motel was not quite clean, and the swamp cooler air conditioner
wasn't hooked up. When we tried to wash our clothes out in the sink
we found its drainpipe was broken off at the sink base so the wash
water ran out on the floor. We tried our wastebasket but it had a
hole in it. We finally convinced the store clerk to trade her solid
wastebasket for ours. As we lay exhausted on our sway-backed bed
hoping for a breeze, a legion of Native American women returning
from fighting a forest fire talked animatedly all the long hot night
outside our open window. Yet we considered ourselves lucky. The
other seven rooms of that motel were filled to overflowing with
those firefighters, whose bus had broken down that day in this town.
We would not have had a room at all, except that, for the first and
only time on the western part of our trip, we had called ahead for a
reservation.
The Best Meal award goes to the
Meson de
Mesilla, NM, for Chateaubriand for Two (see
Cross-Country Ramble 17: Chateaubriand for
Two). The runners up are
the Dakota in Covington, LA, which served us the first really
good meal since Mesilla, and the Artesia in Abita Springs, LA (see
Cross-Country Ramble 35: Eventful Sunday).
The Worst Day award goes to May 28, 1996, the
day we traveled from Sanderson, TX, to Comstock, TX. It was hot,
over 100 degrees and it was 90 miles to the next place to stay. We
thought we could make it because the map showed a 3000-foot drop.
What the map didn't show was innumerable hills. We had started at
sunrise, but as the sun began to go down, we had only made 62 miles.
In desperation, we called a motel in the next town and persuaded the
manager to close up and come get us his pickup. That was the day
Ken's knees started to act up big time.
The Best Drivers award goes to Texas drivers who
regularly moved way over into another lane and often waved "hello."
The runner-up award goes to Louisiana drivers.
The Best Roads for Biking award goes to Texas,
where most roads have six-foot wide paved shoulders.
The Best State award goes to Louisiana (see
Cross-Country Ramble 32: Acadiana! and
Cross-Country Ramble 37: Culture).
The Most Ironic Church Sign award goes to an
unnamed church in Louisiana for "The righteous shall have their
reward."
The Worst State for Non-smokers award goes to
Louisiana, which has smoking in every public place and lots of
smokers.
The Worst City for Bikers award goes to Biloxi,
MS, where many of the drivers created intentional near misses, even
when there was plenty of room to pass. Avoid Biloxi even if it means
going miles and miles out of your way. If Biloxi can't be avoided,
take a cab (see Cross-Country Ramble 38:
Reality Checks).
The Best Vegetable in a Restaurant award goes to
the steamed vegetables at The Seafood Galley on Dauphin Island, AL.
We think this restaurant would have deserved this award even if
there had been another restaurant between California and Florida
that served a vegetable.
The Did I Really Want to Hear This award goes to
a friendly truck driver at a small restaurant in Florida. He warned
us to be careful by telling us the story about the nice couple on
the tandem bicycle he had seen one day who had waved to him as he
went by. When he returned on his route he saw them both dead--hit
and dragged by a truck.
The Roadside Animal Ken Would Most Like to Be
award goes to the mockingbird. They seem not to have a care in the
world as they sing lustily from the highest point around.
The Roadside Animal Ken Would Least Like to Be
award goes to the armadillo. If the "Why did the chicken cross the
road" joke were to be reapplied to armadillos, it would have to be
reworded, "Why did the armadillo TRY to cross the road."
Carol's Best Cultivated Shrub goes to Azaleas,
which were in bloom beginning in Louisiana and continued all the way
to Florida. They were big--some as large as six feet high by eight
feet wide. They were bright. They were fuchsia pink and red and
lavender. They were wonderful.
 Carol's
Best Roadside Tree award goes to Live Oaks draped
with Spanish Moss. We saw them from Louisiana to Florida. They're
majestic. They're old. They're beautiful.
The Best Trip Idea (according to Carol) goes to
Ken, for buying a laptop to take along so we could write this
journal for you. Having you-all along has added greatly to the
meaning of this journey for us.
Ken & Carol |