| Cross-Country Ramble 4:
Fear, Courage and Foolishness Sent: 04/02/96
"I hope you're carrying a piece," said a man we met at a roadside
cafe this afternoon. The first time we heard this reaction, we were
shocked and tried to discuss why the thought of "carrying
protection" is almost incomprehensible to us. This time, there was
just a little interruption in the flow of our conversation and then
we went on to something else. We still haven't figured out how to
respond to this. Fear of getting hit by a car or truck is real every
day for us, especially when our journey forces us onto heavily
traveled roads with shoulders 6 inches wide. But fear of being
attacked by persons unknown isn't real for us. I suspect that this
says something about both us and those who do feel this fear, but
I'm honestly not sure what.
A friend emailed me today, "... all of us who should be doing
something adventurous are opting for the easy way out. It looks like
you will be setting a precedent for the rest of us. I guess that
makes you a role model for the lazy generation." People seem really
impressed with what we're attempting. Many say they admire our
courage. The problem for us is that we don't feel very courageous.
We do understand that the idea of biking across the country is
intimidating. Perhaps that's why the dream of doing so had to grow
on us for 25 years. Then, about five years ago, we finally decided
to do it. If there was any courage involved, perhaps that was the
point at which it was required of us. But once we had made the
decision, it was simply a matter of finding a time and a way to make
it possible for even us to do it. Last November, when other events
in our lives made the trip a possibility it seemed quite natural to
just do it. Our underlying belief is that paying attention to our
dreams is important. It's not that we can do all of them, or even
very many of them. But some of them, even we can do. I think that if
there's anything that might be said of us as role models, it should
be, "My God, if they can do it, then anybody can!"
"What a fool!" This is an unspoken comment that I hear with my
inner ear. Fear of looking foolish is a fear I carry with me all the
time. Most times, I cater to this fear. I am either as careful as
possible to avoid revealing my inadequacies, or I do the opposite,
going out of my way to play the clown (sort of a preemptive strike).
But sometimes I manage to ignore this fear. This is one of those
times. It feels good.
A few years back, a colleague shared the following with me. I've
internalized much of it, but I think I need to reread it now....
Risk
To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out for another is to risk involvement.
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self.
To play your ideas, your dreams, before the crowd is to risk their
loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To live is to risk dying.
To hope is to risk despair.
To try is to risk failure.
But risk must be taken, because the greatest hazard in life is to
risk nothing.
The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing and is
nothing.
He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn,
feel, change, grow and love.
Chained by his certitudes, he is a slave, he has forfeited
freedom.
Only a person who RISKS...is free.
Ken
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